20/12/2021. (That day which you want to forget)

 Remember that dark day in 2018. I remember every thing sweetheart. Im sure that was the worst pain a honest girl could ever face. That happened to you. I remember you a lot especially today. Time passes. And time pased. More times to come. I want you to have a happy life sweetheart. I honestly feel bad about the way I acted. Im not writing now too much because I don't want to hurt you further. If you see this you will remember all of it again and get upset. I know you have moved on. I want you to be happy. Also, I want you to stay safe Baba. All my good good memories about you and us are yet with me. Thats the only thing I have for now. Still remember those weekends which we were walking together. I miss you a lot. I still live inside you. I will stay there forever. I hope aunt and uncle also doing fine. I wish the safety and the happiness of your family. Don't forget I love you forever (though I messed it up). Recently I visited all the places where we were walking in Torrington area. My eyes were blurred. I felt how real was all those moments. How hard it was to leave you in tge evenings. How hard was it to leave in Sunday evening. Remember I took a bus around 6pm. Fights erupted because of the pain. I loved you sweetheart. I have many errors in my hands. I still love you though. You will be mine forever. I don't want to hurt you though. I wish if I could see you once more. At least remotely. I wish.... You got hurt a lot because of me. I was wrong but honestly I felt your pain. Im still in pain. Im sorry. Stay safe. Planning to plant a tree. I will remember you forever. I will plant trees for you I wish they will grow taller because of our love. I miss you. Its December 20th 2022.  ❤️❤️❤️

13th August 2021.

 I hope you are fine. People said trees which I have planted in your birthdays are already on their maximum growth. Soon they will be huge trees. Forget me. Thats okay Baba. Im sure Im the only one who plant a tree (I planted 3-4 in your birthdays. In three separate occasions) in your birthday. I wish you the best. Take care yourself. 

12th August 2021.

 Sweetheart. I hope you are fine. May be you already have children now. May be. I'm staying silent. I dont want to break your heart again. Just remembered of the worst things I did was break ypur heart and flew overseas. It was a August 8th. I remembered but I didn't write. Im sorry for hurting you. I remember you always. I wish you everything but the best Baba. You stay safe these days. Take your vaccine. Hope mother and father also doing fine.

I wish your safety sweetheart. Take care. 

01st of July 2021.

 Im not writing frequently now. May be you are thinking that I have forgotten you. Sweetheart how come I forget you?

I read a book this week. I felt terrible to know in depth how people feel things when they are heartbroken. Im heartbroken and the sadest thing is I was the reason of your broken heart. I felt sad and bad.

I really wanted to see you. But sweetheart I will not bring that pain back to you. Im sure that you are happy now. Im sure that you have forgotten me. I don't want to bring the memories about me back in to your life. I really loved you. I really love you. And I will not stop loving you. You are mine forever. I will wait Baba. I will be a better person. I promise that I will not hurt you again. I will stay in silence forever probably. I don't want to hurt you. I never liked to see you hurt. 

I miss you a lot. 

Happy birthday sweetheart.

 I remembered you a lot on your birthday. I remembered how you were happy to receive a birthday gift from a beloved person. Sweetheart I did some smaller donations to poor. I wished your health and wealth. May the tripple gem bless you always. I wish if I could hold your hand and take a walk in the streets which we were walking usually. Again I want to wait at Thummulla junction till you arrive. Some times you waited there for me. All those places have memories about us. I know you have forgotten things. It's okay. Hard to keep unpleasant/bad memories forever. Am I fully forgotten sweetheart? No memories about me? I always remember you. And I always think "is it worthy to stay in silence?". May be you will hear/feel my silence someday. Silence is also beautiful. I don't want to hurt you again Baba. All the memories are with me forever. With all due respect I will keep my love forever. Hope your mother, father and your husband also fine. I wish you a long, healthy and a joyful life. I wish everyone else of your family the same. So Baba. I didn't forget you. Remember me someday (though Im the worst memory you have).

Take care yourself. 

14th April 2021 (At the Auspicious time)

 6.20am.

Sweetheart I remember you a lot. Time passes. Im keeping my silence hardly. I still remember the terrible memories which I had given to you. Im sorry. Anyway there were many sweet memories in April. Remember how we were waking in the streets holding your hand and shopping. I know Baba there is no space for me in your heart. Do I have a place in your memory? Do you remember me? I know Im forgotten. I felt that a lot. I went closer to the place where we were sitting in Torrington. I took a remote look. I dont want to go back there alone.

Sweetheart it's another new year. I wish you everything but the best. I wish you and your family members longer lives. May all of you be healthy. Everyone.... 

Mamy memories Baba. 

I will stop for now. I haven't forgotten you. Im keeping my silence. You will always be in my heart. I miss you.

Take care your self.

Happy New year.

Here there is a picture which I have taken today morning. 4 years ago I planted three (3) trees at home. You called me at 7am those days. I hope you remember. We just started our relationship. I was telling you "I love you" in each and every call. Sri Lankans call this tree first love. Now its taller than my roof. Love grows. May be Im the only one who planted trees for you. 

1st of March 2021.

 I remember you a lot Baba. Im keeping my silence though. 

22nd February 2020

 Im sure you had your year's most precious party on 18th February.(May be) 

I remembered a lot sweetheart. Well i don't know whether you remembered me or not. 

My be the party wasn't taken place because of COVID19 issues. 

I left my work place. I remembered you at the moment of departure. You told me "you are going there to help people". Your word was a fruitful one. People cried.

A tree planted. It will remember our story. 

I miss you Baba. Tc. 

Happy valentines day to my forever valentine.

 Happy valentines day sweetheart. Im sure that you are having a great day. I remember you a lot today. Time passes quickly. Another valentines day came. Its 2021. No love left for me baba? I wish you everything but the best. May you be happy this day. Soon comes February 18th. That day you attend the party. Anyway those are only memories now. You were an angel that day in a rose colour dress. I miss you. I will miss you forever. Im not a good person but I love you always. Be happy Baba. Stay safe.