1st of January 2020

Im writing this short message in new year's morning. Well beba couldn't ask. Who was your secret santa this time? Just asked. I hope you are fine Baby. I miss you a lot. I was working last night.
Happy new year...
Good luck.
Theruwan Saranayi. 

New year eve.... (31st December 2019 second and the last post of the year)

Well Im writing this in the last few minutes of new year eve. Soon starts a new year. Many new things to come in to your life. You are stepping in a new path. You will find love and you will raise children. You will find the joy in life. Simultaneously you will be forgotten me. Im not requesting or urging you to remember me. I know I was an annoying person. I was a guy difficult to handle and love. You tried your best and I went in a disastrous path. We both got hurt. Im writing to you this new year eve to remember that I would love you forever. I will keep my heart full of love. Im a rude one. I felt your love though. I was so unlucky to lose your love. And tonight I miss you a lot. I wish you a very happy new year (2020)!!!!. May you be happy! May you be healthy! May you live long!. Same wishes go to your parents. Take care. Theruwan Saranayi. Will write again

31st December 2019. New year eve.

Came the new year eve. Wondering why all the new year eves are so disappointing to me. I will not get the answer anyway. Answer isnt comforting either. So sweetheart this year ends. Forgetting me is something you did for the pain. I hope the pain reduced a little. Many endeavours in your life are waiting. Sure you will enjoy and be happy. I want to wish you all the happiness and good health. I hope your smile will shine. I wish your parents good health and long lives. May you be having a joyful time ahead. All the wishes are genuinely come from my heart(With love and blessings I want make all these New year greetings.) Few hours to pass and another year starts. Im listing to the clock. I tried to keep a daily note for you (here in the blog. I never called or write. Not because I have forgotten you. Because I dont want to see you crying). Only reason for writing here is the love. I will not let the love to fade away. I will keep loving you continuously. I will try to keep a message here daily. If there is no more messages, probably Im not living. Hey :) remember though that I took my last breath remembering you and our love. Your smile. Wow what a time. I miss you a lot. Im at work. I will do some activities to wish you good luck tomorrow. Hope you are fine. Im sure that you are too busy. And I know why you are busy. I miss you a lot. Love you. 

30th December 2019-2nd post

Miss you a lot Baba. Remembered how you blamed me once because I messaged a private nursing Officer in my private workplace. Remember? For the sake of our love  I have to say that I never tried an intimate relationship with her (she asked about weight reduction. I adviced her.). Never send a message which is provocative or sentimental. Never loved, never said that I loved, never touched, never asked to meet and never wanted to stay closer. Same way I told about Dammika. She tried and asked many things I never tried to satisfy her. You suspect me a lot Baby. My heart ached because I didnt do anything wrong but yet I was the one to be blamed. I never met or talked to her. About the American girl. She lived in US. I heard that she got married. I did my best to help. I tried only to prevent her being losing the most loved thing in this world  (her mother). I never ever wanted to leave you Baba. Sorry for taking all these memories. Im not in an intention to hurt you. I just remembered the past. Im so cruel and bad. I didnt tried to make love with above mentioned girls. There is one more incident where I was totally helpless. I totally got messed. I miss you tonight. Memories flooded. Eyes are wet. Take care

30th December 2019

A new year is coming. Hope if I could go for shopping with you. Dont think that I have forgotten all the good times. Definitely I haven't forgotten the bad times also. I always remember your beautiful smile. That smile was a sunshine to me. What a beautiful time Baby. You were not only the best partner but the best ever love. You were not only my sweetheart but also an angel. You could love me. I wasn't a good person. But you loved me. Not everyone can love a person like me. But you could. Im missing you a lot baby. Im in excruciating pain. I have to go through this. Clock is ticking and I remember how the time is passing. This year will be ended soon. So 2019 is gone. I know. There are many endeavours ahead and I wish all the success and happiness for you. I wish you good health. I wish good health to your mother and father. Especially your mother. What a dedicated woman. I miss you a lot.
Will write you again.

29th December 2019

Writing this with a great pain in my heart. I know you are in pain. You dont have to explain your self. I cant get it. Always felt your pain and sorrows. Always I tried to understand what you feel and what you felt. Most of the time I was asking from you about your happiness. Remember how many times did I asked "are you happy"?. It wasn't a joke Baba. It was the love. I loved you a lot. I never had intentions to hurt you or leave you sweetheart. I only tried to be with you. Tried to be yours and always wanted to be yours. Tried to be loved. Always tried to love my little angel as much as I could. As a results I still love you. Love inside of me has not damaged. It grows. Only Im the damaged one. Im the broken one. I miss you a lot. This year ends. Love you Baby. Theruwan saranayi. 

28th December 2019

Baby Im writhing this around 11.30pm. Hope that you are fine. Did something extraordinary and I wished your luck. May you be healthy and happy. May you be even beautiful. How much did I tried to see a smile on your beautiful face. I miss all of those beautiful times. I would never forget the pleasant fragrance in your hair. Tonight I will see you in my dreams. I will see my little queen. I know you have nothing good to remember about me. Everything good about you will be with me forever. Missing you a lot tonight. Endlessly loving you.

27th of December 2019

I think you are on your way to work sweetheart. I remember you a lot. Remembered how we were talking, smiling and sometimes fighting while you were travelling in the bus. I never intended to ignite problems Baba. I just had my pain inside me. I was loving you a lot (now also the same) I was much sensitive to anything affects on our relationship. Now im kind of living in dark. I dont know whats the way out. I only know that I deserve to be like this. I should suffer. Anyway I have to admit that I never wanted anything painful to my little angel. How happy was I to see the beautiful smile in your face. I went mad. I was trying to see my beloved one happy. I want you to be happy Baba. I miss you a lot. 

26th December 2019

So the Christmas day is gone. This year will be ended soon. You will take someone's hand. I have to accept the truth. Also have to accept the pain. Sameway I have to be happy for your success. I will never end my love though.. you are my angel and you are my sweetheart forever. Dont force me to stop loving you. No one can force someone to stop breathing. Same way I have used to love you. I shouldn't be forgiven for being a crappier partner. Punish me. You are welcome. You would say Im cruel. Yea may be true. I was helpless too. I was messed Up. Anyway I have to say that I loved you as much as I could. And Yet im loving you. Times are so difficult when I cannot see you or hear you. I have bunch of memories to live with. I will keep loving you always. Tc

25th December 2019

Christmas day. We could celebrate this one if we were together. What would have we done? What will you plan? I remember you a lot. Keeping all these memories inside me remembering them time to time is interesting. Im not privileged to come and see you or talk to you. I feel the way Im being forgotten. Nothing about me would last inside you sweetheart? No memory will be kept? You felt or saw nothing good about me sweetheart? Each and every minute which I spent and spending has a memory about you. I dont want to stop or end thinking about you. I only wanted to love you deeply. I know I was wrong. I know I've got messed. Loving is wrong baba? I didn't try to hurt you. I never thought to leave you. I miss you a lot. 

23rd December 2019

This year will be ended soon. I dont know what will come next. I will be erased from your memory. Thats inevitably a truth. Time will pass but my memory will keep everything traced and saved. Soon you will be stepped forward for a new life. You will find happiness im sure. I wish your happiness too.  There is nothing but the love I have for you. Writing all this not to whitewash my character which was always an intolerable one. I know you loved me a lot. So did I. So do I. Now the only link between us is love. Do your remember our promises? I hope you do. Forgetting them won't make you a bad person. All on your hands. Forget or remember I wont hate you for anything. Never hated you. Never will. Please be safe. Be happy. Keep your smile (little sunshine made my day).
Love you. 

22nd of December 2019

Planted a tree on that painful day. Trees will remember us. They will silently show and sing our painful love story. There are few more plants growing around my environment behalf of you. Always for you. Those trees might become fruiting in a near future. Or they will provide shades/a shelter for tired people. Most of the plants I personally raised from seeds. So here in a rural place our love will grow in to a greenish vegetation. Well 20th also I planted a tree. A tree for you. A tree for our love. (You will blame me. Its okay. Im accepting it). For the next few months I will take care of them for you. I missed you a lot that day. I dont want to say number of times I had to wipe out my tears. I will keep loving you  my way. Blame me and that okay. I love you a lot. Take care Baba.

21st 2019-2nd post

Im in pain. Same way I would be not here someday. I hope sooner or later. And I dont care about the date. What I want you to know that day is the love I kept in my heart for you. I will search for you. 

21st December 2019

I missed you a lot. I miss you a lot now. And I will Miss you forever. Hard to feel the pain continuously. I know what you have went through after our separation. Anyway I know you have taken many vital decisions to move forward. Im happy to see you happy. Im happy if your parents are happy. Im happy to see your mother's happiness. You will take someone's hand who you love the most. Soon you will take a big leap. I will feel nothing More than the misery and the sorrow. I promise and I swear I have nothing hate you. I have few thousands of reasons to love you. Im not asking you to remember me and Im not asking to foeget me either. Either thing I will accept with a great respect. Your decisions will be respected always. Up to now I never ever tried to breach your privacy. Never tried a single insult on you. Never said a single word agains you and never blamed. I will remain the same in the future too. I will not hurt you. All my love will be a silent secret inside my heart. I will keep loving you forever. I can find many reasons to love you. I wish your luck and the happiness.
I miss you always. 

20th December 2nd post

Sweetheart im writing this with wet eyes. So 2 years gone. But the love remains the same. You are the best thing happened to me. So you are the beloved. I miss you a lot. I will live with this pain. Its not easy. I remembered you a lot today. Did some good things behalf of you. May you live lomg and healthy. May your parents live long and healthy. Tc

20th December 2019

Sadest day in my life sweetheart. Never had intentions to hurt you or harm you. Never thought to leave you. I never tried to harm you (I promise and I swear). So this is the day we talked few words for the last time. So this is the day we said good bye to each other. I was in pain since early morning. I remembered most of our better and bitter moments since 5.00am. My eyes got wet didnt know I was crying. Pain has no words same as the love. I felt love and I do love. Same how im in pain too. I hope you are fine Baba. I will think about you endlessly today and forever. I swear that I will not stop loving you. Last night I thought about you a lot. I dont know how to proceed Baba. How should I? Tell me how. I will everything but the best for you. My little angel so I will keep walking through our memories today. Let the eyes be wet. I want to feel that beautiful time again. Take care. I miss you.

19th December 2019

Im in pain tonight Baba. I was in a psychological shock throughout the day. I remember everything. Remembered how you were crying. I wish everything good to you my little angel.
Tc

19th of December 2019

Hi sweetheart. How are you. A December 19th. Word we exchanged are so sharp and so painful in December 19th of 2018. I dont have a way to apologise or to explain my self. Non of the facts won't make you love me. I know. You have given up the efforts of loving. Kind of very good lesson to me. A better punishment. Living without the beloved person's love can make someone's life miserable than a war. Im not telling that love is a war. But there are things to win. Its not a war and its definitely not a silly contest. I dont think I have failed in loving you. But I have failed in some places/incidents. Trust me i never ever had an intention to hurt you, leave you or abandon you. I only tried to be with you always. Wanted to feel the love and to love. Never knew that love could heal a person like me. My eyes are getting wet baby. You are an angel because you could love a one like me. Take care. 

18th November 2019

Im writing this around 12.25pm. Probably you are ready to take your lunch. Probably with Amali. I remember the time when we were desperately waiting to have a conversation around 12pm. I remember all those joyful days. I miss you a lot. The time is passing like a bullettrain. Sooner comes the sadest day in my life. I know that you have the same feeling. I know there is no love left for me inside your beautiful heart. Im the one who broke your heart. I never had intentions to hurt you though. I will be gone from your memory I guess(you want me to leave your heart?). You may want to forget me too. I have no hard feelings sweetheart. I had only love for you. From here onwards also that love will remain. I will be a good man someday. I will search for you. I loved you a lot. I miss you a lot. Take care. I completed this post around 3.00pm

17th December 2019

Im so sorry for giving you much troubles sweetheart. I never intended to hurt you or a put a burden on you. Somehow I have put you you in trouble. I felt your love. My goal was to see you smiling. My goal was to love you as much as I can. I miss those days. And sooner comes a day. A day with sorrow. Two years ago you cried like a river or a rain. Same day I cried as much as the same. My eyes and eyelids became swollen. Everyone asked me why. What shoud I tell them? I know you had the same issue. You had to face the same/similar crowd. I felt that pain sweetheart. I knew what you were going through. Beloved one broke your heart another time. I will be punished someday sweetheart. I welcome that. I miss you a lot.
Please be happy.
Take care your self. 

16th December 2019

Im at work Baba. I remember you a lot. Because from 6.41am to 8.00am thats the time we were talking to each other. How beautiful was the time. How sweet you were (you are always sweet for me). Hard to live heartbroken. I know you are having the same pain. Your pain always felt baba. I felt it. I never meant those terrible things I said to you. I dont want to change my character and white wash it. Im the wrong person. Im accepting my faults. Im the evil. But I never had intentions to hurt you. I loved you a lot. I loved to see a smile in your face. While Im writing this you are taking your ride to work. I wish I could be that lucky person to pick and drop you at work. I remember the sweet little kiss which I received at the end of each ride. Especially closer to your home. I miss you a lot Baba. Take care. 

15th December 2019 2nd post.

Writing this tonight because I remember my little angel a lot. I hope you sre fine sweetheart. I will meet you in my dreams. Please take care your self.

15th December 2019

Sundays were so tough. I had to come back to work. I had to leave you. I was destined to go far. I came to work with a heart full Of sorrows. My pain was broken out in the bus we had some silly fights. To be honest fight broke out because of my pain. Its okay. You said some painful words too. Up to date I never consider those words are serious. I know you loved me a lot. I felt your love a lot. I still have the gratitude of having you in my life. I still have the love for you. Yet I haven't forgotten the best times we had together. I will keep all that love to you same way. I hope you are at home today. I wish I could hear you baba. Or see you.
I miss you. 

14th December 2nd post

Its a saturday. And I remembered you a lot. Remembered how refreshing was the time with you. Im missing that time now. I hope you are fine Baby. I wish your happiness and safety.
Take care pls

14th October 2019

Im not playing games Baby. Buy im in pain. I dont have a will or wish to reduce my pain. I strongly believe that I should suffer equally. I didn't kept our relationship as a secret as a consequence what im going through now isn't all good too. Anyway what is to be come has to. Someday we have to meet the Destiny. Doesn't matter wether is it painful or not I will accept all of it. Im quite sure that I deserve. For me life isn't a beautiful walk. It wasn't too. Only bad thing I did was I made your life a miserable and painful one. I have to suffer well enough for that. I messed up in my life and Im now too much broken to be a good thing. Now I see my self as an animal. Anyway I will not stop loving you. You are the best thing came in to my life. I was so unlucky to let you leave me (or leave you actually). I never intended to hurt you sweetheart. I miss you

13th December 2019

Sweetheart Im writing this around 11pm. I remember you a lot today. I wish I could see you today. And remembered im not privileged to do so. Anyway you will be there in my dreams. I will meet you there. Im feeling the way Im being forgotten. I have no way to prevent it. Im just trying to survive in a deleting memory. I will be somewhere in your heart. You would not even notice. Will not be an important thing to be noticed. Anyway Im trying to be inside you. You are everywhere in my blood. Dont know what should I do when you leave for a new life. What I can say is that I will always keep loving you. I miss you a lot. 

12 December 2019

Time 7.18. Just came to work. Sarting my job remembering your words "you are going there to help people". I hope you are fine Baba. Well I know you are upset. I know that you are in pain. Im the one to be blamed. Im the one who is responsible for all those pains.
Writing this paragraph somewhat later around 10.11am. Sweetheart remember how you came out for breakfast/snack in the morning? I was running to talk with you. I went mad without your call. I felt your love. I fell in love with you. I felt how good person you are. I didn't have intentions to hurt you sweetheart. All I wanted to do was love you. I felt like we have met before. So familiar with you. So refreshing. Loved to breath through your hair. I loved you like a child. I loved you like a boy. I loved you like I was mad. I miss you a lot.

11th December 2nd post.

I know the way you feel sweetheart. I feel your pain. I never intended any of those terrible words I said to you. I was too afraid to take you through an excruciating pain. Im sorry sweetheart. Its not because I didnt love you. I love you a lot. Loved you then. I love you now. Same way I will keep loving you forever. Im so so bad and crappier person. I accept my character. Dont think that I didnt love you.
I miss you a lot. Remembered you a lot today.
Take care 

11th December 2019

11th of December a Poya day. Are you at work sweetheart? May be yes. Anyway a good day to have a walk though. Well. im not the one holding your hand now. May be you are taking a walk today for real. I wish I could rush to colombo like in the past. Give a ride in the evening after your work. And today morning we could meet then. I still love you the same way Sweetheart.  Not the same but even more. I will not stop loving you. I will keep loving you. Living this way is hard. I can take a turn and see the time I have passed but I will not be able to go back. On the other hand time is passing quickly. Two years gone. I remember the everything. I remember the party in February. I remember the December end.
I remember you. I remember us.
I miss you a lot. 

10th December 2019

A rainy day in December. This is the month hurt us the most. I wish If I could go back and change everything. Im so crappy sweetheart I know that. I sold the 2018. You know what that means? Think! (If you remember you will know what 2018 I sold.) Well its gone. I was ill last few days. Had no other way to rest. The medicine which I took was strong. continuously I was sleeping. Had a muscle damage. I hope you are fine Baba. Im writing this around 5.50pm. I saw a dream last night. I saw you. Now my eyes are getting wet. Remember how happy we were when we walking together holding each other's hands? I feel it like a summer time in my life. May be you have forgotten it. I cant urge you to remember me. If you could remember me someday please think that I had much love to you in my heart. Please keep in mind I breathed my last breath remembering our love. I miss you a lot. 

Take care. 

9th December 2019

Im writing this around 11pm. I was sick sweetheart. Had a severe neck pain. I took some serious meds. They totally sedated me. Then I woke up and knew Im having a serious gastritis. That ruined the whole day. I didnt forget you though. I think Im recovering now. Just took some food with a normal appetite. I remember the way you fed me. Like were feeding to a child. I enjoyed those moments sweetheart. I know non of those memories make no sense to you. Remember how my car battery malfunctioned in Colombo? We were searching a battery charger or someone to help us. I miss you a lot Baby. Take care. 

8th December 2019

Its sunday. In the time when I didnt have a vehicle I left for work in Sunday evening. I hope you remember. I hope you remember how hard was it to leave you. My pain of leaving you, broke out on way to work. I was angry and we had fights on the way too. I didnt get hurt but you said some painful things too. Trust me never had a hate when you said so. I had many reasons to love in such situations. I felf sad but Im much stronger than you think. Especially morally. So does our love. We are physically separated but my love yet growing stronger. Im in pain. Only I know how painful this is. But I dont want to give excuses. Im the one should suffer and its my turn to suffer. Longer or shorter I have to go through this. Definitely I will go through this. Im destined. And the challenge accepted. I will suffer for my deeds. Only thing broken and breaking inside me is my heart. My heart is broken, much damaged (physically and morally). I dont care until when it keeps walking,talking, aching and beating. I just care about the love it has to you. I care about the love I had to you in my heart (not its condition. If it loves you maximally Im good to go). I dont care how broken Am I. I dont care the pain. I have only love. I love you. 

7th December 2019-2nd post

December 7th. This year will be ended soon. I dont feel okay Sweetheart. Its a Saturday. Im writing this around 5.30pm. After walking around colombo suburbs we went for home arpund 4.00pm. I remember the heavy heart when I was looking at the bus you were taking. My heart was full pf sorrows. I was looking at the road for some minutes even after you left for home. I miss you

7th of December 2019

When there is no hope people try to restore faith. But for me faith is another matter. Because I always had faith in you. I always had trust in you. Even when you went to that party in February. Even when you deleted all the chats in a sudden and even when you chat with someone and deleted all of it in a sudden. I kept your passwords because I loved you but Not to breach your privacy, (trust me. Kill me I dont care I will not ruin your name, your privacy and my love under any circumstance). Not to humiliate you (yea I said some words sometimes. I swear Im the only one know the amount of love I have inside me for you. I never showed all of it may be. I have it, trust me if you can.). When everything fail I found a way to love you. When you hurt me, ignored me and insulted me I just kept loving you. Even today I dont have a personal issue with you. I have only a unconditional love to you. I will not stop loving you either. Call me a crap, blame me or hate me. My faith is inside you. I trust you. Definitely to the last breath and beyond I will love you. I miss you a lot. And its a Saturday. Take care.
(I will keep remembering the beautiful Saturdays. Missing you). 

6th of December 2019

Hi sweetheart. I hope you are fine. A Friday. This year will be ended soon. I know that Im being forgotten. People dont feel sadness when they are happy. Some said people don't recognize winter either summer when they are happy. Because they have good reasons to think about. The same apply to me. Can understand what a devastating memory was I (what a devastating person was I to you) . I dont urge or force you to remember me (me=pain). Pain is something I have to live with but definitely not you. I welcome it always. On the other side if you are happy I should be happy. Yes I am. If you are happy nothing to be sad (theoretically and emotionally). Emotionally its a hell of fact which has to be deeply understand. More than an understanding I have to digest it.(you will be starting a happy and joyful life soon.). Im okay Baba. I was searching your smile like a child. Each and every day after a walk or a ride, I asked you "are you happy?". I liked to see that shiny smile. A smile like a sunshine. Im going to miss everything. Feels like a journey which would be endless. May be this is my destiny this time. I just wanted you to know that I was a crappier lover, hurt the one I loved a lot and walked away (but loved you like Im mad.). I will love you like Im a mad guy. That was the only happiness for me. And that will be the only happiness.
Take care.
(Finishing this post around 7.25am. Probably you are closer to your office. Have a nice day)

5th December 2019 (posted at 6.30pm)

How are you sweetheart? Im writing this today throughout the day. As I remember you a lot. Days are passing. This month was a sad one. I dont have to describe how and why. Definitely a reason is me. Being a jerk is another reason. I wish I could go back in time and make everything right. Baba do you hate me? I know either im forgotten or hated. Im not in anger. Have no hate toof. As im the wrong person I still have my regrets. I never had a hate for you. I only had love to you. And I will always love you. You will be loved forever. Time is 2.42pm im at work. Around 3.15 you will comeout for your evening tea. Usually you ran to your mobile phone to call me. I remember all of those moments sweetheart. And I remember how desperately was I waiting to receive your call. I went mad if you were late to call me. I loved each and every minute which we spent together. I will be a good person someday sweetheart and you will be able to love me. I know for now Im a forgotten dark era in your life. I feel sad.
I miss you. 

4th of December 2019

I was writing this post for a long time. But im much late to post this. Because im doing a three day duty. Dalys are rainy many people come to my work place for help. As you said and as you requested Im doing my job correctly. Im helping people as you defined. All the effort because of you. Each and every time when I help someone my heart calls your name. Its because of you sweetheart. I wish I could go back and experience all those good moments with you. I know im too late and im being forgotten. But I kept my word here. I miss you a lot in day and night. I hope you feel my pain and my prayers sometimes. You are always there in my thoughts.
I miss you sweet.

3rd of December 2019

Im writing this around 4.21pm. I think you are already on the bus or may be you are getting a ride now. I wish I could drive you to work and to home. I miss you a lot always. I will keep writing here about all my love. I cant show my love to you now. Im not privileged. I shouldn't too I guess. Some day  you will leave for a new life. I will not change my love Baba. Its with me forever. Im so so unlucky to leave you. But I will not give up on you. It will be you always. Always you. I start to think about you when I get up and throughout the day I keep thinking of you. Even prior to sleep you come to my mind. You are such a beautiful person in my life. No doubt why my sould is attached to you with a deep love.
Take care. 

2nd of December 2019-2nd post

I miss you a lot Baba. I feel terrible about me and my deeds  im frustrated about the way I behaved sometimes. But I have to say that I loved you a lot. I love you forever.
Good night. 

2nd of December 2019

Here it goes sweetheart. Its the December. The most painful/pain filled month of the year. My eyes will remain wet throughout this month. For leaving the love behind/for kicking out the real love from my life. So let me suffer. I never intended any single word I said to you Baba. I told that I dont feel a love to you. I told that I dont have love anymore. I told every possible cruel thing to you. Im the only one who knows the enormous love reserved to you. I fell in love with you at once. I have the love to you always. I was just afraid to take you through a hell of pains. I was helpless within my self. I was to broken to be someone. I was too crappier and broken to be a good lover. Im a mess and I was a messed up person. Could you love me Baba? You loved the evil. You are an angel. In my broken soul I still love you though. Im writing this around 3.34pm. You probably went in to office after your evening tea/snack. I remember you a lot. Im in pain and im in love. Im stuck in my conscience.
I miss you. 

1st of December 2019-(2nd post)

Writing this around 7pm. Usually this is the time when your come home after her work. I still remember her dedication sweetheart. She is a very good person. Only mother except my own mother who could bring tears to my eyes. I relly cried one day in front of you. The way she loved you. My mother loves me the same way. Sweetheart how are you? I hope you were at home today. May be busy and I know (I feel) why you were busy. You will move forward. Its okay Baba. Then remember you will be the most loved. Because I will not stop loving you too. I will never interrupt your life (I promise.) But I will not stop loving you. Blame me,hate me, think im bad, and blame if you like. I will not stop loving you. Im so so evil. Im a very bad person. I was a bad lover. Anyway I will not stop loving you. Im in pain Baba. Im in pain because of love. Im in pain because I have messed up my life. Im in pain because im far away from you. Im in pain because I cant see or hear you.
I remember all the happiness with you. I still remember the way I was looking at you when you took 120 bus. I wanted to shout and cry each and every Saturday evening. May be you have forgotten. I lived my lifetime in a moment I spent with you.
I miss you.